Come to Me

I had been walking with Jesus about 13 years. To be more accurate, sometimes I limped alongside Him, more often I was attempting to drag Him the way I wanted to go, and much of the time I was digging my heels in the God-blessed earth asking Him, “Why in the world are we going that way!” I’d been in a long season of waiting. Waiting for God to move in some way to make my circumstances more comfortable, more palatable. I didn’t understand God’s ways and now I can see I was more interested in being in control of my circumstances than allowing God to be my center, infusing my soul with His love amidst my circumstances.  

I was a restless wait-er. 

Waiting for God’s time was as natural to me as breathing under water. Yet, my life circumstances were so far greater than my ability to control or bring peace and order to my internal world that I felt like a bug on its back, legs clamoring madly to attempt to flip me over so I could continue hunting for soul-rest. Clamor as I did, I was also powerless to do that. 

Blessed Curiosity

One day while on the elliptical machine at the gym, I thought, “God, What are you up to in me in this dreadful season?” 

After some rotations I heard a whisper in my head, “I am infusing you with my grace. You work so hard that there isn’t space for me to infuse you with my grace. I need to allow you to reside in this place in order for you to crack open enough for me to get more of my grace into you.”

Tears. And more tears until I was the woman on the machine at the gym going nowhere fast with a tear-stained face and an occasional heave. It was only a month earlier that I had come across Matthew 11:28-30 while reading the Message version of the Bible,

Unforced Rhythms of Grace

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion?”...yes, I was completely worn out trying to make life with God and others work my way. 

“Come to me. Get away with me”...what an invitation. Why am I resistant to this invitation?

“And you’ll recover your life”..By getting away with you, Jesus?

“I’ll show you how to take a real rest”...I wonder what that looks like?

“Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it”...you really want me to do life with you, Jesus. And you are waiting for me to join you. Ahhhh, you must be far more skilled at waiting that me, for you have waited a loooong time for me to come to you and you’re waiting for all of your people to come do life with you.

“Learn the unforced rhythms of grace”...I know nothing of this kind of life. So much of life felt forced. Wifing, parenting, homeschooling–I was pushing.

“I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you”...so many years with you and I’ve missed this. So much feels heavy on me.

“Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly”...you really like my companionship, Jesus. And something about being yoked to your light and easy yoke will bring freedom to my soul. 

I wanted that kind of life, but it evaded me. Throughout the past 14 years, I have drawn closer to Him, responding to His constant invitations. As I have gotten away with Him, he has infused me with His grace in spaces in my soul which were closed to Him before. I’m finally resting in the reality that He is a good, good God who can’t wait for my invitations. Sometimes emotionally jarring situations knock me out of this light and easy yoke. But, I am finding my way back to Him more quickly than before as I practice coming to Him.

To what or whom are you yoked in this season? What is the impact on your soul? Jesus is inviting you to “Come.”